a year ago today...

some of you may remember reading about our son joshua last year. well, it was exactly one year ago today that we watched him be born. you can read about that starting here (then here, next here, and then jump ahead in the story to here - these should at least fill you in).

i wanted to take a moment today to honor the son i'll never know. i'll never have the chance to help him bait a hook or wait patiently for that first deer to emerge from the trees. i'll never get to read stories, pray and tuck him in at night. i'll never see him do a lot of things - but i will see him again. in fact, i'll get to see him without a lot of things. without the baggage of this difficult life. without the roughness and toughness that the pain of life brings.

i'm sad today as i reflect on a full year since joshua's birth. i can't believe we have been blessed with another son, just 3 weeks ago. Asher will never know his brother joshua. tomorrow we'll be placing joshua's ashes in the earth under a beautiful tree on our south dakota paradise. we'll also be baptizing Asher and thus is the irony of this life and this upside-down kingdom that we are a part of - death is actually a gateway to life.

please pray for us today and tomorrow as we remember the little boy, joshua, who never took a breath, but changed our lives forever. god rest his soul.